Shi Zhang
I am a PhD student in Applied Linguistics at the University of Reading. My research focuses on how bilingual speakers acquire and process languages.
Location Reading, UK
Activity
-
Shi Zhang replied to Mehrdad Fathi
Good job! You presented us a well-structured essay, which suggested that immunology is an important subject.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Basak Avci
Good job Basak! Your essay is well-structured, but some further work on choosing the appropriate words would make it even better. Good luck with your future writing!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Juan Sainz
Congratulations on completing this course! You did well in explaining your ideas, but there are a few things worth noting: 1) avoid using abbreviations like "don't" and "that's" in academic writing, as they are not formal enough; 2) to which paragraph does "The people of the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland (UK) have big confidence in their...
-
Shi Zhang replied to Lupe Sanjurjo
This is a well-structured essay. Some of the words you used were a bit confusing though: for instance, it is not quite clear what "within these" and "superior" in your first paragraph meant. A bit more work on English vocabulary would certainly further improve your writing - and congratulations on finishing this course!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Anaïs Martin
Congratulations on finishing this course. I noted that the article you uploaded might be incomplete. Moreover, you do not need to write down "paragraph 1", "paragraph 2" when writing a formal essay.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Camille Bonne
Well done Camille! You did really well in structuring the essay and supporting your ideas, but do note that you made some minor mistakes in choosing the appropriate word - for example, the "deserved" in the fourth paragraph might mean "serve", and the "although" in the same paragraph should be "however".
-
Shi Zhang replied to Bashayer Tw
Congratulations on finishing this course. You have shown a very good command of using connectors and structuring your essay, but some of the words you used are a bit confusing. For example, it is not clear what "brighter reasons" mean in your first paragraph.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Kazue Takeda
Be more confident in yourself, this essay is a great one. You have clearly showed us why foreign language courses are becoming less popular in New Zealand. There are just some minor typos, e.g. "skills languages" in your last paragraph.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Margie-Sarah H
Congratulations on finishing your final essay! The structure and your organization of the ideas are pretty good. However, could you please check your paragraph 2 to 4 again? Its layout seems rather odd on my computer.
-
Shi Zhang replied to EnNaji Almansouri
Your use of connectors is fantastic and your vocabulary is great. Your essay would be better if you work a bit more on organizing your ideas and evidence - for example, in addition to your original evidence, you might also want to let us know whether or not translation practice helps students to improve their writing performance.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Qurratulain Salah
Congratulations on finishing this course! From your essay I can tell that you have understood how to structure an essay and argue for your ideas. Your use of vocabulary might be a bit inappropriate - e.g. "lethal" might be too strong for your topic; working a bit more on your vocabulary would be helpful for you in the future.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Hongwei Zhong
Thank you very much for reporting this problem, I will report it to the course coordinator. Perhaps you could post your essay using some alternative tools, like the Baidu Word?
-
Brilliant writing, I really enjoyed reading your essay. Congratulations on finishing this course!
-
Well done! This is a brilliant essay, but your conclusion may be further improved - by adding ", which are not used anymore after the Games" to "... many facilities.", your conclusion would be a more precise summary of the arguments in your essay.
-
Shi Zhang replied to junior moyo
You did really well in organizing the essay. Note the use of expressions like "science buddies" though, as it does not seem to be formal enough for academic writing.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Lancelot Ian, Aguilar
This is a nice and interesting essay, but your organization of this essay could be even better. You used two paragraphs to argue that the status of Shintoism in Japan has lead to the popularity of mythology, but only two sentences to describe the idea that the entertainment industry may also have played a role in promoting mythology - this "two paragraphs vs...
-
Shi Zhang replied to Evangeline A
You did really well in writing up this essay - it is well-organized, the arguments are well-supported, and your use of vocabulary is absolutely fantastic. Regarding your problem with the word limit, I would like to suggest you to reduce the length of your essay by describing the cited studies in a simpler way - for example, you can discard the information...
-
This is a nice essay, with a good structure and a brilliant conclusion. However, some of your expressions were a bit difficult to understand - e.g. "Importing coffee beans that main product they have and roasting to give customers a good tasty and special flavor." Perhaps you can make sentences like this easier to understand if you break them into two or three...
-
Shi Zhang replied to Cristina Pavón Pérez
Well done! This is a nice, well-structured essay. A few things worth noting though - there are some typos in your essay, including: *nawadays, *oportunities and *according with. Paying more attention to this aspect in your further writing would be helpful.
-
Yes. It is fine to put that sentence at the end of the first/introduction paragraph when you are writing a full essay; however, as this task only requires you to write one paragraph on a specific topic, it might be better to put that topic sentence at the beginning of your second paragraph.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Nieves Garcia
Nice attempt Nieves, but note that you will need an introduction section to give us the background and the thesis statement of your essay.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Moyosola Hassan
An interesting writing plan. Looking forward to seeing your full essay.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Marta Jiménez
For instance, in Paragraph 2 you have "children learn languages more quickly than adults", and this is a paragraph leader; you will also need a main body in this paragraph to support this leader. The main body can be scientific findings which support the idea of the leader.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Laura Bertolino
Nice work Laura. I would like to suggest you to merge your Paragraph 1 with the introduction, as you Para 1 is providing some background rather than arguing for an idea.
-
Shi Zhang replied to farzaneh moradian maram
Nice work. Good luck with your essay!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Eduardo Kessi
An interesting topic. Can't wait to see the presentation of Transantiago in your essay.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Hongwei Zhong
This is really well-organized. Looking forward to seeing your essay soon :)
-
Shi Zhang replied to Yuriy Kucherenko
Nice work Yuriy, but note that a thesis statement is about what you are going to discuss in your essay. Try to make your T.S. more closely related to your title.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Paulina Vargas
Well done Paulina! Your logic is very clear and this is really brilliant. There a few problems with your use of words though: e.g. *more travelling -> travelling more frequently, *more easy and cheap -> easier and cheaper. Looking up how to use English plurals might be helpful.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Marta Jiménez
An interesting topic, but please do remember that you will need to have a leader as well as a main body for each paragraph.
-
Well done Emily. However, some of the words you used were a bit confusing - for example, it is not quite clear what the "boasts" in P2 means; words like "3-tier", "1-tier" cities are not widely used outside the context of China, so substituting them with "smaller", "mega" cities might make your paragraph easier to read for people from other countries.
-
Nice work, but remember that when you write the essay, you will need to make clear connections between your thesis statement and your paragraphs. Therefore, you will need to be more clear in explaining why the sole reliance on oil and corruption are driving people out of urban areas - simply listing the impact triggered by these two factors will not answer...
-
Good job Vassia. Your plan for writing Para 3 is especially good: the content of the main body will clearly support the leading idea for that paragraph; you should try to make the logical connections between the Para 1 &2 leaders and the main bodies more clear, just as you did for Para 3.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Evangeline A
An interesting yet controversial topic. Remember that you may need to explain what biomarkers are and why they are good for health in the first paragraph, as not everyone is familiar with these terms/concepts.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Jose Pedro Cartaxo
Nice attempt, but you may want to revise the content of your Para 2, as it is related to how to exercise properly, rather than to explaining why physical activities promote health.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Silvia Arias
Nice work. However, you will need something more specific for the main bodies. For example, you should say more about why eating fresh fruits and vegetables is important - it can increase our intake of fibre, micro-nutrients and so on.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Kaylim Kang
Wonderful!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Ohn Mar Win
This is a vivid description of life in Yangon, but do remember that we should focus on academic writing in this course - therefore, you should write in a more impersonal style by using less "we" and "I".
-
Nice attempt; your use of vocabulary is absolutely fantastic. However, do remember that it is always better to put the topic sentence at the beginning rather than at the end - the topic sentence tells the reader about your idea from the very beginning, and sentences at the end usually sum up the content of a paragraph.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Kalkidan Addis
Hi Kelly, good job. Remember that, for academic purposes, you will need to make your writing more impersonal - in this case, substituting "my town" with the actual name of a town would be helpful.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Celio Morais
Nice attempt Celio. Note that you are required to write a paragraph focusing on one issue - in this case, you may want to focus on how people in Natal spend their spare time, rather than anything else.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Clara San Juan
Brilliant Clara. Your paragraphs would look even better if you could start the third paragraph with some phrases that connect your second and third paragraph.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Quyền Trần Mạnh
Nice attempt. Remember that you should put the topic sentence at the beginning of your paragraph rather than at the end, otherwise your readers may experience some difficulties in figuring out your idea.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Shiho Wilkinson
An interesting paragraph. Well done!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Kyrill Schilow
You are making very good use of connectors, Kyrill. Just one minor typo: *Secondly, there are a lot of ... -> Secondly, there is a lot of ...
-
Shi Zhang replied to Luis Arrieta
Good job, Luis. Perhaps you should give us a topic sentence by pointing out that most people visit Medellín because of its "everlasting spring", so that your readers would better understand what you are discussing.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Marcela Aravena
Although you may not recommend Santiago for living, your good use of quantifiers should be appreciated :)
-
Shi Zhang replied to Roxane Jannin
Well done, Roxane. There are a few errors on subject-verb agreement though, for instance: *there are a lot of school -> there is a lot of schools.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Marion Dieringer
A very good introduction of the attractions in Stuttgart indeed. To make it better, you can use a few more connectors - for example, rather than using "being a petrolhead", you can use "if you are a petrolhead".
-
Shi Zhang replied to Thalles Castro
Great. Next time you can try to introduce different reasons by using phrases like "firstly", "secondly" as connectors.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Galina Demina
Hi Galina, great paragraph. Perhaps you should use the sentences after "... the Baltic Sea" to form a separate paragraph, in order to show the transition - you have finished introducing the geography of Saint Petersburg, and you are now introducing the cultural aspects of this beautiful city.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Hongwei Zhong
Well done Hongwei. Just one minor issue with agreement here: *there are a lot of businesses -> there is a lot of business/there are lots of business.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Anne Suorsa
Great. You are making very good use of tense and conjunction words.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Lancelot Ian, Aguilar
Very well-written. Newcastle is a great city indeed.
-
Great job, well done!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Asila Alaamri
Well done. There are something worth improving though:
Sentence 1: *in Business and Science -> doing/studying Business and Science; not many of Arts and Humanities -> not many of them are Arts and Humanities;
Sentence 2: *a few number -> a few;
Sentence 3: *in Business -> doing/studying Business.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Minh Hoang
You surely can, though it would sound better if you write "not many sciences students in the social club come from Japan", as the function of the article "the" is to add some limitation to "students" - with the presence of "the", the "students" will only refer to the students in the university social club. In fact, the use of English articles is very complex,...
-
Brilliant. Just one thing: in the second sentence, *everyone of them should be every one of them.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Galina Demina
Good job, Galina. There are a few minor mistakes though:
*The majority of students -> the majority of the students;
*Most of students -> most students/most of the students;
*Nearly everyone students from S. Korea do not -> Nearly every student from S. Korea does not; -
Well done. Note that there are a few mistakes:
*the majority of business students -> the majority of the business students;
*many of science students -> many of the science students;
*all Art and Humanities students -> all the Art and Humanities students;
*is a Business students -> is a business student. -
I've heard that the Netherlands is quite bicycle-friendly. I look forward to seeing the content of your essay :)
-
This topic is really interesting. I look forward to seeing your essay.
-
Nice attempt, Olga, but your title seems a bit confusing. Perhaps you wanted to discuss the reasons why some people prefer to choose a child-free life style? Additionally, remember to write a few sentences on why you are interested in this topic.
-
Good choice. However, according to the reasons you've given, you may want to change your title into "... why people should go to Spain for a holiday".
-
Good choice - this is a very interesting and complicated topic. You may want to let us know more about why you are interested in this topic.
-
A nice and important topic. Good choice.
-
Interesting topic. Two minor typos: *will that -> while, *that are bad -> they are bad.
-
A very interesting topic indeed. I'm sure your personal experience will help you produce an excellent essay.
-
Nice topic. I look forward to seeing your essay soon.
-
An intriguing title. Can't wait to see the content :)
-
Interesting topic - consider giving us a more detailed explanation about why choosing this topic?
-
Nice topic.
-
All these titles seem interesting, but you may want to focus on one of them and explain the reasons for choosing that topic.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Florina Kaum
Don't worry. Just keep going and you will learn how to organize your ideas, write in an appropriate style and decide a good title.
-
Shi Zhang replied to ADRIANA RAMIREZ
Hi Adriana, from your comment I can see that you already have a good understanding about what a good title should be. Just keep going and you will find it easier to decide a title for your essay :)
-
It's nice to know that you found this course helpful. I'm pretty sure that your academic writing skills will keep improving.
-
Nice writing, Masa, I can feel the nostalgia from your paragraph. However, note that people usually write more formally in academic writing - for example, rather than starting with your original introductory sentences, an essay would start with more objective sentences like "Nowadays, most people in Japan would turn on air conditioners when it is hot, but it...
-
Shi Zhang replied to Megan Rayner
Hi Megan, you did really well in explaining how consumption was limited during the second world war; a few more sentences on how income constrains our consumption nowadays would make your paragraph more balanced.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Milena Kerley
Very nice writing indeed, Milena. You may also want to pay a little more attention to some minor details, e.g. spelling (*begging -> beginning).
-
Shi Zhang replied to Tanya Zhavner
You did well in giving an interesting description of life in the old days in Russia/Soviet Union, and your paragraph would be even better if you compared it to the modern life in Russia :)
-
Shi Zhang replied to [Learner left FutureLearn]
Nice attempt. It would be better if you wrote this paragraph in a more formal way, by using less "I /we ...".
-
Shi Zhang replied to Maria Villalba
Well done Maria. Your writing is well-formed, but note that you are required to write a paragraph on a single idea rather than on three different ones.
-
Nice attempt. Your paragraph could have been better if you told us the name of your country, and a few details about how people study in the past, and what modern device they are using now.
-
Well done. You are making excellent use of evidence to support your opinion.
-
Excellent writing, Sanaa!
-
Shi Zhang replied to Juan Contreras
Hi Juan, this is a well-written paragraph. However, you should let us know which country you are writing about.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Thalles Castro
Nice paragraph Thalles :)
-
Shi Zhang replied to Francesco Maione
Good job! Your paragraph could be better if more details about what political changes Italy has gone through.
-
Shi Zhang replied to Etna Sánchez
Well done Etna. You are making good use of evidence.
