Rewriting content: a few examples
In the last step, you were challenged to write some content for a marketing team’s “About Us” page on their company website.
Using a set of neutral facts, and drawing on your learning so far, you were asked to create something which made the team seem more interesting, approachable or professional.
How did you get on?
As a reminder, here are the facts you had to work with:
- This company has a marketing department.
- The main marketing team is based in London, with smaller teams in Lima, Miami, Accra and Bangkok.
- There are 50 people in the whole team.
- The team is responsible for all marketing copy and materials, including websites and so on. They also handle campaigns, alongside the advertising team.
- Projects are allocated to staff with relevant experience.
- Team members have a range of industry experience and some members have been in the company for a significant amount of time.
The following are examples of how the text could be presented in different ways. After each, there’ll be an explanation of the thinking behind each transformation, and things to look out for.
At MegaCorp, we believe that marketing makes the world go round. Our global team spans every continent and almost every timezone, meaning we’re always working to bring our client’s products and brands to life. With expertise in all aspects of marketing, we’re well-equipped to deliver digital, print and in-store experiences and promotions which your customers will love.
This version draws inspiration from the team’s locations around the world to present them as world-wise, experienced and a safe pair of hands. The opening phrase is bold and uses a well-known phrase to underline their stance. Using words and phrases like experienced, expertise, well-equipped shows confidence and is reassuring to potential clients.
Megacorp’s global marketing team delivers effective customer-focused solutions for clients across a range of industries. From Farming to Pharmaceuticals and from Lingerie to Loyalty cards, we’ve seen and done it all. With over 100 years of marketing experience between us, we’ve got the skills you need to take your brand to the next level.
This version emphasises the different sectors they’ve worked in, to show breadth of experience. Naming specific industries piques the readers interest, and using a small amount of alliteration (Lingerie/Loyalty etc) gives the piece a sense of rhythm. Using “we” is inclusive and engaging, too.
Meet the MegaCorp Marketing team. We work hard and play hard. We like eating out and ordering in. We travel, explore and learn. We question, challenge and create. Wherever we are, we’re on your side.
Derek is our Head of Global Marketing. “I’ve worked at MegaCorp for two decades and I love the range of clients and campaigns we have” Miriam is our Client Services Manager, based in Accra. “My favourite campaigns? Anything involving food!” Ash is our Digital Solutions Developer, based in Bangkok: “If I was a beverage, I’d be an espresso. Short but packed with energy!”
This version is more playful than the others. It personifies the team through describing their collective habits and passions, and it gives each member of the team a voice by using a quote. You can imagine what this would look like accompanied by photos of each team member. It also uses short sentences to make the text more impactful.
General tips for rewriting content
- Experiment with tone of voice.
If you don’t have a particular tone guideline, think about how you could use words to explain, persuade, boast or support.
- Try things out
Rather than trying to get it right first time, write a couple of versions and see which phrases or ideas seem strongest.
- Mix things up
Don’t be afraid to play with words, use a combination of short and long phrases, and even use well-known sayings or references to help make your point, if appropriate.
- Stick to the point
Remember that you can be creative, but you also need to deliver the required information, so don’t let your central point get lost.
Have your say
Were these examples like what you created, or any others you saw? Which elements do you think work particularly well? Or what do you think might be off putting? Share your thoughts with other learners in the Comments section.